AY!!!!

For the last couple of days I've been absent from this blog for two major reasons...

1) I don't really think anyone reads this...well, maybe it is read....

2) I'm not really good at keeping a journal.

I thought that because it's online it would be easy...but I'm not a journal type of gal. So, I'll continue to do my best.

Lot's of things have gone about these last couple of weeks. For starters I talked to my ex-boyfriend once again. I finally was able to come clean with all that I was feeling and thinking about why this relationship is not going to work as he would want it. Then I started thinking that maybe it was me who had a fear of commitment...well, duh! I do, with him. I think it's mainly because I have yet to meet that one person that is for me. I've been looking for him forever...and all the time I've gotten burned and hurt. So, this time around...it's time for me...alone time for me and for my kid. I honestly have not been single since I started dating...at the tender age of 17. It's about time!!!

Another one of my little issues is that I often have pain due to my arthritis. Yeap. At my age I a have RA (Rheumatoid Arthritis). It's a very painful disease. It can be excrutiating at times. I was diagnosed at the age of 22 and have since been periodically checked by a specialist. Who continues to tell me that I must begin treatment. Which I would if I was certain that I no longer wanted to have more children. You see, the 3 options given to me are so strong that they can cause cell mutation...or possible infertility....I don't want that. I want to take care of that part of my anatomy as much as possible. Of course this means that the longer I wait the sooner I may begin to experience bone erosion...AY!!!! So, to round it off...I often have stiff fingers for the first couple of hours of the day....then I can type. Well, I can type anyway.....I've just been lazy to update this...What this had to do with the above...I don't know.

Just another thing to vent about...peace y'all!!!